Hidden Grief
by Aelis
Summary: A day of rain and reflections for the flower girl bring back painful memories of a special someone.


Hidden Grief  
  
I wrote this thinking of Aerith's feelings and thoughts. It's a one shot fic and has a dim, hopeless feeling. I was a bit depressed while writing this, yet I like the feeling of rain...Enjoy. ^^  
  
~***~  
  
Midgar. A scar in the planet. A dreary place to live. Yet..there was Mako. Mako was power, money and all the people wanted. That is why people lived in the scanty areas of Midgar. Shinra knew that well enough. And while Shinra Inc. filled their pockets with money, half-starved children ran into the roads wearing dirty rags which looked like torn old clothes. They never saw the sky, the sun rise or the beautiful sunset. They never watched a flower grow in a pot in delight as it bloomed. They never went to picnics with their friends or families. People constantly struggled to live, others just gave up on life and passed their days staring upwards at the huge metal plate which covered the sky and the sun's rays. Life wasn't easy; it was a miserable struggle to get whatever you can from the little they could get. Happiness was a rare word; it was just another forgotten thing, just like the sun.  
  
Her face was always the same. Always with a huge smile implanted on it. She walked down the slums, as she did everyday. It was a routine, she had to earn money for her and her mother. But she did not complain. She liked life like that. Plain and Simple. She trotted down to the small area, hidden behind a caravan to where her house was. She loved it there. She sat down, her face bearing no emotion while she gazed at the grey sky. It was the only place where you could see the sky in these decading slums. Life was an eternal struggle to live.. yet life went on regardless of people suffering, dying and mourning. And she knew that. Just a while ago she had seen Shinra soldiers beating up a small kid for stealing a piece of bread. When she had saw them, a strange feeling grew inside her; rage and pain. She wanted to give them a taste of their own medicine, but she was weak... she couldn't do anything to save the boy. She wasn't able to fight as well as Soldier would. She didn't even have materia. The only one she had was totally useless, yet she kept it for a special reason. She sighed while leaning back. She felt helpless and depressed. She couldn't do anything, she just had to live life as it was given to her... just as all the people did. It was the only way of living she had been taught. To forget your pain and smile over pain.  
  
Yet...   
  
She knew a person who had challenged the fates. Who had walked out of problems with a huge grin. That person had shown her that life could be changed, if you really wanted it... And she did want to change her life. For herself and all the people in the slums. She desired a better life, a new world.  
  
She still remembered him clearly. His eyes, blue as a deep ocean of secrets, his grin; wide as always and his voice, voicing his hopes, his revolutionary ideas and his dreams. It was imprinted in her mind till she would die. She remember that day too well...  
  
----------  
  
She sighed while flopping down on a bench near the huge building which was holding the new play called "Loveless". It had been a bad day; few flowers had been sold on that day. She was hungry, tired and disappointed. A few Shinra soldiers pranced around looking pleased with themselves. She didn't even bother with them. Shinra soldiers and slum inhabitants didn't mix. They were like chickens and birds. Both sides detested each other.   
  
She stared at the floor full of thoughts. Life was hard, sometimes after a day's work she would lie down and wonder how people live through all this cruelty. Just for Mako.. She frowned mentally. Surely Mako was not that important.. A voice interrupted her thoughts. She raised her eyes to look at who spoke at her and found herself staring at the deepest and bluest eyes she had ever seen. Surely.. were they natural? He grinned sheepishly at her. Her expression didn't change, she cocked her head curiously. "Yes? Can I help you?"   
  
He paused, staring in front of him as if in deep thought. Aerith raised a brow and continued.  
  
"Would you like a flower? It's only a gil."  
  
His eyes opened wide. "I haven't seen flowers for quite a long time now. I'll buy one" he said cheerfully.  
  
Aerith smiled and handed him a flower. His face broke into a huge grin, just like a happy little child, she thought. He handed her some coins and started walking away.   
  
"Wait, you gave me 10 gil!" She rose to her feet to give him his change but he raised his arm and said "I know how much I gave you."  
  
He hurried onwards leaving the flower girl staring at his back.  
  
That was rather kind of him... and to think he came from Shinra, considering his armour. Maybe not all Shinra were bad people after all...  
  
----------  
  
A week had passed since the appearance of the strange soldier. Another day had started. Aerith trotted down the road in her usual cheerful self. She turned around the corner of the building which was the play humming merrily. As she turned the corner her eyes widened as she spotted the soldier who bought the flower from her. At the same moment he caught sight of her. He looked rather agitated and restless. She nodded at him and asked him if he wanted to buy a flower. Looking rather relieved he accepted.  
  
---------  
  
Weeks flew by. She was used to seeing Zack now every week. She smiled to herself and walked up to him. He appeared worried and deep in thought. Aerith sat down on the bench besides him and poked his arm gently. He stared at her as if he was unable to speak. She raised a brow and waited for him to talk.  
  
Zack gulped and turned to face the flower girl.  
  
"Would you like to go with me to see the play "Loveless"?" he spoke rapidly as if he had practised it before.  
  
She stared at him in confusion at his nervous face. She studied his behaviour in silence. Then her face broke into a huge smile.   
  
"Sure" she said.  
  
His face broke into a huge grin. He was smiling so widely that she couldn't help but laugh out.  
  
----------  
  
Her cheeks felt wet. She wiped them furiously only to have more tears replaced on her face. Were these tears? "No.. they weren't serious. Right?" she told herself while burying her face in her knees. She felt wet fingers on her face and she stared upwards while watching the tiny droplets fall on her. It was raining tears of grief. She felt it. The sky felt Midgar's pain, her grief and the despair falling within the land. She let her tears fall freely while she stared upwards towards the darkening sky. The sky was crying with her, she smiled slightly. She felt more comfortable now; she was not alone anymore. Maybe.. she did love him after all. But he left now...and it was too late to tell him how she felt. 


End file.
